That doesn't frighten me. I mean, I don't like not being liked. But it doesn't frighten me. What does frighten me is the fact that many, many drivers don't leave nearly enough space when they overtake.
It's so easy to knock a cyclist off their bike. And, if you do knock them off, the cyclist (maybe me!) will probably end up with lots of broken bones and might die.
I guess I've been thinking about this as it's my birthday today. Hooray!! I've clocked up another year!! And I'd really love to be here to celebrate many more years to come!
So, this is my birthday plea to all drivers out there; no matter how much you hate the fact that cyclists are allowed on the road, please please please move out and give them plenty of space when you pass them.
...and, em, just for the record; I don't particularly like being stuck behind bloody cyclists either! But, I do bide my time and make sure I'm giving them plenty of space when I overtake. I'm ashamed to say it wasn't always that way...
Bloody Cyclist!
I’m a bloody cyclist
Who loves to ride her bike,
I’m loathed by many motorists
Who see me as a blight.
They see me cycling on their road
Then all they see is red,
Their temples pulse, their
voices rise:
‘There’s a bloody cyclist
ahead!’
‘What gives them the bloody right
To use the bloody road?
They don’t pay any taxes,
They don’t know the Highway
Code!’
‘Folk on bikes are idiots
They always jump the lights,
They never wear the proper
gear
On dark or foggy nights!’
‘Those Sunday cyclists;
they’re the worst!
You know the sort I mean;
Spread across the bloody road
In lycra-wearing teams.’
‘And roundabouts – don’t
start me!
Cyclists don’t have a clue!
“Which lane is it I should be in?
Oh, I don’t know what to do!”’
‘Bloody cyclists! MOVE YOUR
ARSE!
You’re causing a delay!
Go cycle in a Velodrome,
Get out my bloody way!’
On and on the driver goes,
With angry vitriol;
Venting their frustration at
Us cyclists one and all.
Though, if I’m being honest,
Then I guess I should admit
That I was once that driver,
And I’m quite ashamed of it!
Before I loved my bicycle
I’d only use my car,
I was that bloody driver
Who would just take it too
far.
I’d curse at every cyclist
Who’d dare to cross my path,
I’d rant and rave behind my
wheel
With fierce and angry wrath:
‘Get out my bloody way’ I’d
shout
I’d criticise and scorn,
I’d overtake before I should
I’d even hoot my horn!
I was that bloody driver,
I too thought I knew best,
I too thought every cyclist
Was a royal bloody pest.
I’m really quite embarrassed
That I thought it was OK,
To treat all cyclists on the
road
In that bloody awful way...
So, if all this sounds
familiar
And you’re that driver too,
There’s something, as a
cyclist,
That I’d like to say to you:
I know you get frustrated
When you want to overtake,
I understand your anger
When I make a wee mistake.
I know I’m often in your way
And slow you in your tracks,
I understand your carping
On the issue of road tax!
I get your irritation
With the cyclists who break
rules,
Who jump the lights, don’t
look behind,
Behave like bloody fools.
But please, I beg, remember
That we’re not all one the
same,
That numpties who jump lights
and such
Don’t do it in my name.
And, yes, we sometimes get it
wrong,
We make the odd mistake,
But drivers sometimes do that
too,
Pull out, don’t indicate!
And if you check your facts
about
The tax disc you display,
You’ll see that you don’t
own the road
Or have the right of way!
Is it too much to hope for,
Or too much to dare expect,
That we could treat each
other
With a little more respect?
I wonder if it’s possible
That you could change your
mind,
Could be much more accepting
Less frustrated and more kind?
Can’t we just be buddies?
Can’t we use the roads in
peace?
Put up with all our nuances
And let the griping cease?
I hear what you are saying,
That you’d like me out your
hair,
But just like tractors and
their loads
I’m not going anywhere!
So, please accept my slowness,
And I’ll accept your slips;
Bikes and cars are here to
stay
Let’s make the most of it!
Lastly, here’s my pipe dream,
My wish on which to end:
That every bloody driver
Be the bloody cyclist’s
friend...
©Jane Milne
This is one of the rhymes from my little book 'One Woman's Verses vs Cancer'. All of the profit from sales is being donated to Women V Cancer. Click on the photo of the book opposite for more information!
